Maria is a holistic wellness specialist with a private practice in Massachusetts. Last year I asked her, “What is the No. 1 question you’re asked about growing a practice?” Her answer was thorough and thoughtful: “How do I break through the networking barrier and communicate with people who can send clients my way?”

“When I make those connections, I always get more clients,” she added.” I have the skill set and experience. My pediatric training far exceeds most people in my area. And I know I provide a valuable service.”

The problem? When Maria does meet potential new clients, she doesn’t follow up. “I sometimes make flyers and never put them out,” she confessed. “I plan classes but never reach out. I even know the right places to network. What’s holding me back?”

I bet you can relate, because I know Maria isn’t alone. After coaching hundreds of therapists, I know I can teach massage therapists the marketing strategies that are proven to grow unconventional practices. But whether they would actually put those strategies into motion was a different question.

Hidden Fears, Missed Opportunities: Taking Back Control

There are all kinds of hidden fears that trigger self-sabotage. But for most massage therapists I work with, I’ve found it’s simply the fear of rejection. And I can appreciate that. You work in a profession that has been misunderstood by some, but especially now, when more research is beginning to suggest the real benefits massage therapy offers, making connections with potential clients is vital to growing your practice

Before networking events where you have the opportunity to meet potential clients or even referral partners, the most important thing you can do is this: Take control of  your thoughts.

Our thoughts affect our feelings, our feelings affect our actions, and our actions affect our outcomes, right? So when you empower your mindset — when you intentionally decide what you’re going to think — you give rise to a new sense of confidence. And just like fear naturally repels people, confidence naturally attracts them.

To take control of your thoughts, try developing what I call “Client-Attraction Paradigms.” A paradigm is a governing belief, or set of beliefs, that dictates how we view the world. We all have thoughts swirling around our heads about a variety of things that affect us, but here pay particularly close attention to the thoughts that come to you when you’re thinking about talking to someone about massage therapy. Do you automatically assume people are to think you’re trying to sell them something, which might cause you to feel disempowered?

If so, commit to really working on finding different ways to think about what you have to offer potential clients.

Instead, make the decision to stop being a victim of your habitual thoughts—and choose paradigms that empower you to reach out to more potential clients. To get a feel for what these paradigms could look like, consider four of my favorites:

I believe:

1. Every individual I speak with is infinitely resourceful, and always capable of finding the means to invest in something they want.
2. I am always in service to their highest potential and not their deepest fears.
3. They are each fully seen, fully loved and fully appreciated every moment by forces seen and unseen. Every one of them has a vast spiritual support team around them at all times.
4. They are each powerful beyond measure, even when they can’t see that for themselves. And they're capable of altering their circumstances in an instant.

These are things I not only believe to be true, but I’ve taken steps to anchor them in my my approach to everything in my life. I’ve literally spoken these thoughts out loud, to myself and to clients, until my awareness of them has become second nature.

That’s how I overcame the habit of thinking potential clients would shy away from me because I was trying to “make a sale.” When I embodied how deeply in service I was, everything shifted. And when I’ve taught this technique to the clients in my training programs, everything shifted for them, too.

I believe the same can happen for you when you decide to start redefining how you think about the value you bring to your clients, and how you talk to potential clients about the role massage therapy can play in their health and wellness. Empowering New Beliefs to Adopt

Here are a few more empowering paradigms from some of my clients, all massage therapists just like you. Notice if these new beliefs can begin to feel true for you, too:

-What I have to offer is precious, unique and valuable, and the time for offering it is NOW.

-My potential client is infinitely resourceful and supported in her journey, just as I am. If we are meant to work together, the resources will arise to meet us.

-I have been led on this divine journey every step of the way. It is my sacred obligation to respect this and to stay in integrity with my guidance. This is not about me.

-I trust that there are always greater forces at work for all of us, at all times.

-People want to feel seen, heard, and accurately reflected. This is healing.

-My perfect clients will resonate with me and my message, and be drawn to work with me.

-I trust myself and I trust the universe.

Can you imagine how enthusiastic you’d feel connecting with new prospects from this perspective? It’s like upgrading the software in your mind, so instead of fearing rejection, you experience the love of connection. This is what makes it easy to network — and follow up — with potential new clients. Because now you just might be the answer to their prayer.